Sacrificial Love: Part II

Something Just Ain't Right
I have too much that I do not deserve.
When it comes down to it, I'll admit. My parents work hard and they are good savers. I don't really have to worry about money, but I'm not one of those kids who are born into the world with my life paved for me.

I don't WANT my life to be paved for me- I'm paving my own. And I don't want to become so sucked into this materialistic world that the value of my dollar decreases. I want it to be worth a million to me. Every exchange should be a well thought out trade-off. Economics 101. Don't buy stuff you don't need.. for real.

But sometimes money is on my mind. I quit my job.. and maybe because it's the Christmas season that I spend so much more.. but that's exactly what I hate about Christmas. Isn't Christmas about Jesus? I think Christmas lights are pretty.. I think real Christmas trees are beautiful and smell even more wonderful, but I don't need it. It goes to show how much we waste.. in time, money, and energy... towards things that are.. the worse choice. We waste so much electricity powering up Christmas lights, even if it's just one month out of 12. We kill so many trees that could be used for other paper goods. Sure, a fake tree isn't as authentic.. but hey.. global warming. Global heating. Even if you don't believe it.. what harm could it do to save a little?? It's your money from your pocket that pays for these ephemeral, aesthetic things.

When millions are suffering and dying in foreign countries, we are Hollywood and we have enough money to surgically beautify ourselves. When the news shows some of the realities of the world... VH1 and MTV promote petty drama and materialism. When there's people dying of hunger, we are sitting in our SUVs to buy burgers at a drive through.. and I really think that something is wrong. We need change... why don't we spend all this time, energy, and money.. on each other.

Why don't we spend it on LOVE??
Sacrificial Love: Part II
(Part I was on Dec21 if you would like to refresh your memory.)
Do you know what altruistic love it? I've been told that I possess this kind of love. It is putting others before yourself.. with a genuine concern for them. I'm not trying to promote myself. I am telling you observations that others have made of me. And this blog is where I am honest and open..because "those" cannot read it. I must say, I don't think I am like this all the time. I can think of many times where I put myself before others. But the basic idea is.. loving someone at the level where you know that loving them is a commitment, in which you must give up your time, money, and energy, yet you still continue through with the relationship.

As Hybels says, sacrificial love is great, but the biggest drawback is..dun dun DUN!!!: BURNOUT!

Those that know me.. probably associate me with this word. I haven't been brave enough (or smart enough for that matter) to draw my boundaries yet. I am beginning to, and it's not that bad! :) But Hybels says that people who are moral and well disciplined say although they are out of love, they are still going to give all that they have. That sounds a lot like me.

But honestly.. that's very commendable, but is that a good choice? Things people ask you to do become obligations. Acts of kindness become a bar to reach- a status quo that is ever increasing. Phone calls that cry for a listening ear become invaders.. intrusions of quiet time- time for YOURSELF to sit back, relax, and recharge.

I always describe burnout to Mom as "if I was a car, I started out with a full tank, but I'm out right now. And as much as I WANT to go ahead and keep going, I can't because I just have no fuel. I have no more fuel." I'm really glad Hybels brought up the empty tank idea. He brings up THREE types of tanks we have: Spiritual, Emotional, and Physical.

After reading this chapter, I realize that I'm struggling so badly because I'm completely out of ALL THREE.
Spiritual: I'm running a race again.. and it's a marathon. I can't bear to slow down because I feel like I'm being unproductive, but honestly.. sometimes doing NOTHING is the BEST thing to do. Constantly on the run doing this and that.. for this person and that person and for apps and for graduation, etc etc etc. It will never stop, but I can. I NEED to too! I need to do those quiet times... and just embrace that solitude. I need to be encouraged in God and take time to fuel up spiritually. Remember when Jesus would always go to the mountain and pray? Golgotha or what not. I need to take that 15 minutes. that 1 hr. whatever.

Emotional: Major life changes drain you emotionally. You got that right! Close friend diagnosed with cancer. Another getting over cancer. Graduating. Housemates. Relationships. Internships. Work. Academics. Grad school applications. Future decisions. Parents' health. I was faced with a LOT of big decisions this past qtr.. and I was drained emotionally.

Hybels tells of two ways to refuel emotionally: 1) RELAX!! 2) Recreation
1) I started doing this thing to try to help me relax before I sleep or if I am very high strung-- closing my eyes and listening to my breathing. Just focus on my breathing. It helps a little. What also helps to write it all out on paper or blogs. A third way is to pray. I'm doing really well with relaxing in proportion to the level of stress I am faced with at this current moment.
2) Recreation: Do what you LOVE DOING! I love running. I love boxing. I love doing arts and crafts. I love reading. I love working out. And I'm going to just DO THEM. I need it. That's what I will call "Me Time". No one can interfere with those things.

Physical: 1) Eat 2) Sleep 3)Exercise
I was pretty meh in all 3 areas. I'd say close to 40% F. This should be easy for me to take care of. Minimal coffee this qtr. More sleep. 2 PHE classes. :D I'm really trying, guys. I'm not kidding. I WANT THIS.

Never shall I give up my sacrificial love, despite my empty tanks. You can sacrifice AND take care of yourself to maximize effectiveness and efficiency. Balance. Don't have to give up your morals or your "me time".. see, lg?


Love sacrificially :),
lg, LG